I have no desire to insult or dissect “Z Densetsu ~Owarinaki Kakumei~.” How would one even go about analyzing this? Your guess is as good as mine. It’s only a preview and yet it includes mech bears, eating, electrocution, Tae Bo, bad dancing, and tickling. They are dressed as Power Rangers, but their only reason for doing so is to cosplay and act sexy down by the docks. In true Momoiro Clover fashion, it makes no sense whatsoever.

It sure is fun though!

I am still feeling worn out by most idol groups. It’s not that I dislike the worlds of H!P, AKB48, and increasingly kpop. It’s just mentally exhausting. Morning Musume is, or at least has been, obsessed with looking mature and the Kids can’t decide if they want to be mature or quirky. AKB48 doesn’t have the identity crisis but they do have too many identities. And aside from Orange Caramel, kpop idol groups are rather formulaic in what personalities they portray. Deep down, I probably do like all of these groups. It’s just too exhausting to care about them.

For now, I have Momoiro Clover Z to save the day. It’s not a group that cares about looking mature or cool. It’d be pretty difficult to be cool while wearing Power Rangers costumes. It’s not a group that has an identity crisis. They did have a membership crisis, but that comes with the territory with idols. It’s a group that is just out to have fun. Their videos are utterly absurd and “Owarinaki Kakumei” doesn’t disappoint. What more could one ask for?

Well, a rap from Akari. But alas…

I do know that if they intend to use John Travolta as motivation, there is plenty of material to work with…

Ok, it’s not a dance. However, we know that Korean idols shower together. Why not bring this knowledge to T-ara’s concept? Music Core has been doing outdoor performances lately…

So you thought Hyuna and Rania were notorious for in-your-face crotch thrusting? Well, John and Jamie Lee Curtis have been doing it for decades. He’s even been doing it in shorter shorts than T-ara will wear!

What?

Ok, this is just a personal preference. Enough of this psuedo retro bullshit. T-ara, you can be the ones that go all out and recreate a Grease concept. DO IT.

Of course, T-ara isn’t the only idol group to have a music connection with John Travolta. Did you know that Perfume’s “Chocolate Disco” was used in a John Travolta movie? Amazingly, it happened before the members of Perfume were even born!

Anyways, today is different. And in today’s world, PASSPO☆, a group that’s only a few months removed from the world of basement idols, can get booked for an appearance at Japan Expo in Paris. How is that even possible? It was only a few months ago that I was watching them perform (on Ustream of course) in a lineup of unknown basement idol groups. There were only a few thousand viewers and the 99% majority of them (based on the chat) were Japanese. Yet, here they are, making history and going in France. Is it a sign that idols can exist in some sort of global niche market? Is it just a bubble? Who cares! It’s pretty interesting to watch it all go down.

I could go on about how different the idol scene is today as compared to even just a few years ago. But that’s not even the point of this post…

There is this television show in France. It’s called Japan in Motion. As far as I can tell, it’s something like Japanorama, without the British-centric “oh look at the funny cultures” implication. But I’ve never seen an episode. Anyways, they have some sort of poll* where PASSPO☆ is cosplaying and you can vote for your favorites. My French is a little rusty, but I think it says that the pose were randomly selected out of a hat and the photo was photographed by the PASSPO☆ member that wrote the selection. You know what that means… time to analyze!

There is no Anna in this set, which is a FAIL.

* NOTE: The contest is over and the page disappeared in the middle of writing this post. They deleted the larger images off of their server and don’t have them. So you will have to use your imagination about what the larger size images look like.

Well, before I get into this, you should know something about PASSPO☆. They are a little eccentric. That’s putting it nicely. They are downright weird. I don’t mean Momoiro Clover LSD-induced strangeness, but they aren’t generic personalities.

The Model: Masui Mio
Photographer: Iwamura Natsumi
Costume: Priestess
Pose: Angry Beethoven

Isn’t “Angry Beethoven” a bit redundant? Natsumi isn’t the most popular member of the group and could do well from Mio association. I’m not sure why she choose Beethoven. I can only imagine that Natsumi reads Delicious Cake Project and wanted to get a PASSPO☆ member to imitate a pianist.

The Model: Negishi Ai
Photographer: Okunaka Makoto
Costume: Little Red Riding Hood
Pose: Giraffe eating

This is the first of three giraffe eating poses that we will see. We will look more into who does it best later…

The Model: Makita Sako
Photographer: Fujimoto Yukimi
Costume: Cheerleader
Pose: Sexiest pose

I’m going to call shenanigans here. There is no way that Sako, considered one of the more attractive members, just happened to get “cheerleader doing your sexiest pose.” And this is here best attempt as a “sexy pose?” … Did I feign enough outrage?

The Model: Okunaka Makoto
Photographer: Negishi Ai
Costume: Chinese Dress
Pose: Narcissistic Rock Singer

Where’s the cigarette and the booze?

The Model: Sakumo Kaho
Photographer: Anzai Naomi
Costume: Alice In Wonderland
Pose: Witch Casting A Spell

I don’t know anymore.

The Model: Anzai Naomi
Photographer: Okunaka Makoto
Costume: Maid
Pose: Giraffe Eating

The second “giraffe eating” pose. I just can’t touch this right now.

The Model: Mori Shiori
Photographer: Masui Mio
Costume: Maid
Pose: Yucky’s (Nickname of Fujimoto Yukimi) Head About To Sneeze

Ok, here’s a quick PASSPO☆ primer. Everyone picks on Fujimoto Yukimi. They pick on her because she has a gigantic jaw that puts Natsuyaki Miyabi out to pasture. They pick on her because SHE’S WEIRD. Or sometimes, as on display here, they pick on here simply because she is Yukimi. In fact, Mio and Shiori forgo the sneezing part altogether. Just have someone protrude their jaw, say “AHHH! YUCKY!” and you have an instant classic PASSPO☆ joke.

The Model: Iwamura Natsumi
Photographer: Fujimoto Yukimi
Costume: Sailor Suit
Pose: “Rocky takes blows without collapsing”

This is the suggestion of Yukimi. I told you that she was weird. Why would you suggest Rocky getting punched without falling down? Yukimi should have had Natsumi as Mickey screaming “GET UP YOU SON OF A BITCH!!”

The Model: Fujimoto Yukimi
Photographer: Okunaka Makoto
Costume: Panda
Pose: Giraffe Eating

Ok, I’ve delayed this as long as possible. First of all, I went to youtube to watch a video of a giraffe eating for this scientific evaluation. It’s gross. They have gross tongues. That said, it’s time to compare…

An Ugly Ass Giraffe

Negishi Ai

Anzai Naomi

A Beautiful Banana

Ai doesn’t even bother to open her mouth. I’m not quite sure how she thinks she is going to eat. She does portray the freaky eyes and large ears perfectly though!

Naomi is the only one who seems to understand that giraffes eat with their tongues. This would be a fantastic portrayal, except Naomi has freakishly gigantic lips, and I don’t like it when my attention is drawn to them. I really don’t like looking at them.

Yukimi. I don’t know what this girl is doing. She looks like she is constipated. The panda suit gives her nice ears though…

The winner… Yukimi, who jaw could be mistaken for a giraffe’s neck on a foggy day.

It’s never that simple.

It just so happens that, over the past few months, I’ve been in several discussions about fandoms. It was awkward a part of these discussions. “What am I fan of these days?,” I kept asking myself. I follow a lot of acts. I like a lot of acts. I’ve stayed awake to watch Internet shows from the likes of PASSPO☆ and Brand-new idol Society. I watched G.Na do the exact same performance (save wardrobe changes) of Black & White more times than I care to remember. However, I’m not quite sure that I can call myself a fan of any solo or group act right now.

I used to be a fan of Hello!Project. I can say that in confidence as I can remember having visceral reactions to the graduations of Mutou Mika and Arihara Kanna. I used to be a fan of Perfume. There was even a point where I was a Kara stan. And I have to at least mention the Sixophrenic That Shall Not Be Named. I’m not really sure how to explicitly explain how I knew I was a fan. I just was.

This all started to change last year. For the majority of 2010, I couldn’t be bothered to pay attention to the idol and wota worlds or communities. I’ll spare you the details of exactly what 2010 was like for me. I think that, at some point, I got too involved and eventually felt that a break was necessary. A lot changed during my break period. There was finally membership changes in Morning Musume. There were major shifts in popularity as interest in AKB48 and SNSD exploded. The technology has changed and it has allowed for sort of a proliferation of idol awareness. For a person living in Massachusetts, there are more ways than ever to follow idols (and non-idols for that matter); concerts and shows are now streamed live, everyone has a twitter, and everyone has a youtube account. In many ways, the scene is better now than it was when I would consider myself to be a fan of specific groups.

However, despite the improved landscape, I don’t care as much as I did. But is it even a problem? I think the scene is more enjoyable now. I have more fun reading Akanishi Jin’s twitter than I did worrying about Kanna’s line distribution. I can shamelessly fawn over BEAST without learning a damn thing about the group. I can watch Jewel Kiss and their three fans without worrying about them having no fans. Best of all, sales numbers and charting talk has zero effect on me.

In other words, I prefer the “passionately apathetic” (h/t Murr) approach than actually being a fan of the groups.

There are downsides to this approach. It is an approach that avoids emotional highs and lows, and I consider both of those being vital parts of being a fan. When PASSPO☆ sold 42,000 copes of “Shoujo Hikou” and reached #1 on the Oricon Weekly Sales chart, I reacted with a shrug. Don’t get me wrong, I really do like PASSPO☆. Plus, I think it’s pretty amazing that a group that could barely sell in the hundreds for their indies singles coerced enough wota into buying 40,000 copies. But if they sold 1,000 or 100,000, I would’ve reacted the same way. This is definitely a dull and boring way to experience idols, but it’s the bed that I’ve made.

So, back to the original question, am I a fan of Berryz Koubou? Well, I’ll follow and observe them. I’ll like some things they do and dislike whenever Sugaya Risako is involved. I’ll make jokes about them. But if they disappeared tomorrow, would I care? Not really. I’d be extremely interested in how everyone responded and I’d be extremely interested in what it would mean for Hello!Project. But for me personally… Would I have any sort of visceral reaction? Would I care like I did when Kanna and The Mutou graduated? Probably not.

In the end, I think I like the concept of idols more than idols themselves. I wouldn’t recommend it. But it works for me.

You may know me as broomhead. Well, I’d prefer to leave that name behind me and I’ll be using Brian from now on. I last blogged on TLS about 18 months ago. Broomhead is a name from that time and I’d like to keep it in the past.

That being said, I’m going to restore a select number of TLS posts. I’ll be restoring some of my favorite posts, entries that I want to update or respond to, and the entire “Was Haromoni Worth Watching” series. I’ve already restored the “A Surprisingly Look at Ongaku Gatas” entry.

Other than that, you can find me on International Wota, twitter, and tumblr.

Big Bang, as a group, has not been a presence for quite some time. Sure they released three successful singles in 2010. However, there is more buzz and interest in the solo activities of the members of Big Bang than in Big Bang as a group. Compared to G-Dragon and T.O.P.’s collaboration album, Seungri’s solo mini-album, and Taeyang’s increasing global popularity, Big Bang as a group has been stale.

It’s obvious from this video that Big Bang’s popularity and global presence has exploded since their last mini-album. The group isn’t just in Las Vegas, they are on top of the MGM Grand in Las Vegas. They are staying in the SKYLOFTS at the MGM Grand. This is a group that is not content with dominating the South Korea music scene.

However, there is a serious disconnect between the members. Whenever the group is assembled together (which isn’t very often), they appear as if they want nothing to do with each other. I wonder if the song was even recorded in the same studio. It comes as if Big Bang has been gathered together after avoiding each other for the past 12 months. In some ways, that is exactly the case.

This begs the question: Is Big Bang a supergroup? A topic surely left for another day…

I purposefully used an awful image of her. It didn’t take much searching. Ok, that was the last Mika Mutou joke, I swear.

I never thought I’d be writing this. I never thought I’d care that about Mika Mutou graduating. I never thought that I’d be upset that Mika Mutou was leaving. But, here we are.

some boys! blog has the report that Mika Mutou is graduating from Ongaku Gakas and Hello!Project.

And I am actually wishishg that Mika Mutou, OF ALL PEOPLE, would be staying.

It is an industry where looks matter. Yes, personality, singing, dancing, hard work, all of these matter as well. But looks matter.

“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.” This is also true. Just because the industry dictates who is pretty and who isn’t doesn’t mean you should listen to it. Make your own decisions on who you think is attractive and ugly. It doesn’t have to be based on looks. Your own personal reasons for calling someone beautiful can be based on personality. But for the industry, looks matter.

She may have good photos of her. But almost everything we see is a bad photo – whether it is due to the angle, lighting, her face, whatever. She may even look better than other girls if none of them wore makeup. The fact is that, as an idol, Mika Mutou was not pleasant on my eyes.

But she stood out. Oh boy, did she stand out.

Now, I don’t know the business plans that UFA/H!P both have for each girl. But is it possible that the promotion of Mika Mukou was intentional? That the fan reactions – both in Japan and overseas – were intended? That’s a stretch to say without any real evidence. But it wouldn’t be the first time an idol has been promoted as an ugly puppy. I don’t know every single girl of Onyanko Club and AKB48. While my brain thanks me for this, it prevents me from citing specific examples. However, with so many girls, and ones that I have seen that were ugly, I’m sure it is plausible that creating an “ugly” idol has, and possibly will, be done.

If Mika Mutou was supposed to be an ugly puppy, it worked. People have stood up for her. I’m sure if she stayed with Ongaku Gatas longer and the group got more promotion, there’d be even more supporters.

I’ve actually grown to appreciate Mika Mutou, in some weird, backwards way.

You see, I am somewhat dismayed as a Hello!Project fan. Sure, there are some moments where everything is gravy. The decisions being made do not sit well with me though. I am powerless to stop or change the directions that the groups are going. I can only sit back and watch. And in a way, Mika Mutou has been the outlet of my frustrations over H!P. I could always count on something that I could compare to Mika or say “well, at least is isn’t Mutou on TV.”

When I see a walrus on Haromoni, what am I supposed to think? Great TV? No, it’s not. When Risako Sugaya sings or Aika Mitsui is part of the background in music videos… Great entertainment? No. But putting Mika Mutou on display and allowing me to get a cheap giggle in, I’m all for it. It become a rare constant in today’s H!P. I actually started to look forward to it. She was a walking punchline, but I could always count on it.

And, for whatever reference one may desire, here are all the horrible, awful things that I’ve called her over the last few months:

• Walrus
• The Hulk
• Elephant

• 

  Haromoni-080330-05

• An ox in the Oregon Trail
• A warthog
• A train
• Another walrus

I’m gonna miss her.

It doesn’t even last a full second, yet I’m looking this far into it.

Nine different attempts to produce one single facial expression. First of all,
all of these were too closeup to enjoy this face in its full effect. Besides that, how well did Ongaku Gatas show this expression? What are we looking for here? It’s simple, to pull off the perfect surprised look. What is the perfect surprised look? Well…

Yuri Sawada trumps Hitomi Yoshizawa at her own game. Three details that define this look. The eyes have to be bugged out, this is possibly the most important feature. It is impossible to look surprised when your eyes don’t change at all. This effect is accentuated by the second feature, the arching of the eyebrows. The last detail can be performed in many, many ways as you will find out. After all, people look very different when they are surprised. Still, you’d have to make some sort of “wow” motion with your mouth to get the right effect here.

Asami Konno – Konkon is so naturally bug-eyed that it probably didn’t take much to open her eyes as much as possible. Her eyebrows stand still which kills the whole surprised look. She definitely wow’s but it looks like she is just shouting “wow” instead of being surprised. If it weren’t for her eyes being Konno’s eyes, this would definitely be a travesty.
Wow! Look Rating: 1.5

Minami Sengoku – This simply won’t do. Pulled apart from the rest, it looks as if Minami is just naturally singing. Eyes and eyebrows stand still.
Wow! Look Rating: 1.0

Erina Mano – She’s cute. Believe me, she’s cute. But… Well… Come on, she’s not doing it! I can’t give her the best rating on something she doesn’t even attempt properly, can I? I can’t!!
Wow! Look Rating: 1.5

Mika Mutou – Oh boy. Well, I’m laughing, I suppose that is the right effect. Perhaps it was not the proper cause and effect that’d you’d want, but I’m laughing. Her eyes do widen and her eyebrows do arch… But what is she doing with that mouth of hers?
Wow! Look Rating: 2.5

Hitomi Yoshizawa – A laid back performance but someone known for setting the standard in facial expressions. Even when she’s not doing her best work, it shines. Her technique is perfect and there’s something about how odd this is that makes me laugh. A top notch job!
Wow! Look Rating: 4.0

Rika Ishikawa – Rika, well, went a different route. I can’t appreciate abandoning the stated goal, to make me laugh with a surprised wow face, entirely. This is what makes Rika Rika though and, to an extent, I can appreciate that. People love and hate her for this.
Wow! Look Rating: 2.0

Miki Korenaga – It looks like it’s going to be a disaster at first glance. But what looks to be bad technique is Miki reaching deep down to pull off a fine performance. While unorthodox, she pulls off the eyes and arches the eyebrows to perfection. Her early move takes away from the mouth saying the “wow” but not entirely. A surprising effort.
Wow! Look Rating: 3.0

Yuri Sawada – I’m using her as the standard, what do you think I’m going to say this is a failure??
Wow! Look Rating: 5.0

Mai Satoda – She gets some hand action in this, which a lot of other members have abandoned. On the other hand, she looks like something exploded right in front of her and she is going “WHOA!” While that’s fine, we got requirements to meet here.
Wow! Look Rating: 2.5

Arisa Noto – While her eyes don’t move, her eyebrows do arch. She looks like she is smiling more than saying “wow” but Nocchi always looks like she is smiling one way or another. This isn’t the best technique and performance, but Arisa has done everything else right in Yattarouze! that I’m going to cut her a break here.
Wow! Look Rating: 2.5